I rant you risten

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

post worthy?

Random thought of the day

What if two identical twins married two identical twins.. rod and tod married ally and sally.. and now both couples had children.. would the kids look exactly the same? I mean is that even a possibility? Would they be couswins? Has this ever happened? I'm sure it has.. Then what would happen with the parents, would the children be able to tell their parents apart? Would the parents be able to spot their own kids? Am I just aimlessly wondering about stupid things? Can someone answer my question?

A battle of epic proportions

While in the shower scrubbing myself up this past weekend, I noticed something in my peripheral vision, something big moving about on the shower curtain rail… I look up to catch sight of a medium sized, nay, it was a giant spider pausing to size me up.. After initially getting my spiderman dream out of the way (getting bit by the spider and getting superhuman powers), I decided it would be best to tackle this issue while there was no soap in my eyes.. once done with my shower, I stepped out to see where the vile beast was, only to find him guarding my exit, hanging around the door with his fangs ready for war.. There we were, me, naked dripping water on the tiles looking for my weapon of choice, and he suspended there waiting to pounce, preparing his venom for the skirmish. And then calling upon the spirit of my ancestors I prepared for battle, I reached for the box of tissue paper and dealt him the whack of all whacks.. Spider juice splattered the door as my enemy fell to the ground, his 8 outstretched legs now squished and his entrails breathing the open air.. in my naked victory, I saw it fitting to celebrate king kong style grunting and beating my chest as my opponent lay motionless on the cold tiles.. opening the door I continued my naked grunting parade into the bedroom to scare off any other giant monstrous creatures considering interrupting my shower.. and then I realized that I had gotten water everywhere and the balcony curtains were drawn..

In honor of all things facial

Laugh the headline off a bit.. All right, back to it – Apparently May is moustache month.. I'm thinking about shaving off the goatee and keeping a handlebar moustache.. or maybe a general lee, maybe a musketeer would be cool… although Saudi 80s businessman is a great look too.. hmm.. just do this, love thy stache.. treat it with care.. and if you haven't groomed it in a while, go and give it a new look.. I hear the musketeer is making a big comeback (I'm just trying to instigate)..

An announcement regarding Pearl Jam

I gave them a chance over and over again, I tried, but I'm gonna go out now and say this: Pearl Jam are overrated... Eddie Vedder, I liked you more when you drank and were a reckless misunderstood rambler. If you love Pearl Jam, let me say this: At one point in my life, I loved Pearl Jam too.. their first 2-3 albums were some of the best tunes that defined my growing up years. Nothing sounded better.. then album after album they started sucking, and when I mean sucking, their music quickly became some of the worst buys I ever made (and I've made some horrible music purchases over the years). I gave them every opportunity to win me over, I bought their cds, I listened to their new releases, but was just continually disappointed hoping for the next cd to be good. and then a couple of months ago, I read with great big hopeful eyes how Eddie Vedder came out to tell everyone the old Pearl Jam were back.. they were back to being angry and that the music on the new album was going to rock again.. and then do you know what happened? I bought the cd and realized that Eddie Vedder was a lying sack of shit. Their music hasn't changed at all, there was nothing radical about their sound.. it was like they were still regurgitating the same crap of the past couple of albums with a twinge of the old Pearl Jam.. you guys may be angry, but lay off the green tea, go hit that bottle of Jack Walker Black (when you know him as long as we have it's jack) and come up with something ballsy.. I will subject myself to another three listens to your cd, if you have not changed my mind then, I will never buy another Pearl Jam CD as long as I live (well unless it's really good and it's confirmed to be really good)..

The final update

Since moving to my new digs at work, my coffee machine was out of commission for the longest time. Last night I stopped off at the super and went on a cube provision restocking frenzy in which I procured some fingerlickin' lavazza for the machine. This morning I decided it was time to get ol'krups back on the wagon, and you know what? she's purring like a kitten. so yes i'm back on the perked up and slightly wired java-train. now all I need to do is learn how to make a good cappuccino –'cause there's nothing finer than fixing a woman a good cappuccino and watching her drink it..


Desert Island Boy said...

Actually, BR you won't have to go very far to have your Random thought confirmed.

I once met GDN reporter Soman Baby's family. He has a set of twin brothers. They married a set of twin sisters.

I don't quite recall how the kids turnd out....

scarlettepimp said...

regarding your upper lip honour, i dare you to make hitler proud. you sound like an eccentric enough guy to sport a barberous kinky facial tease. hilarity is courageous.

Bahraini Rants said...

Desert Island Boy..
Not the Soman Baby, the roving reporter for our illustrious and venerable newspaper, gulf daily news???

I am eccentric and quite strange at times.. i'm thinking of the musketeer.. but if it attempt something, i'll probably end up shaving all my facial hair off.. gonna go visit the barber and have him style me a slick 'stache..