me and the blog are takin' a holiday.. 5 weeks of absolutely nothing....
stay tuned for updates...
I'll try to post regularly ... hell, I don't think I ever posted regularly..
don't you hate the recirculated air on airplanes? makes you feel like your skin was getting exposed to everyone's germs... think of all the airborne bacteria floating around... sheeeeeaaaaat... why do all airport toilets stink?
hamama noody noody - the effect of a double jw black on the rocks with soda... can't believe my flight got delayed....
Friday, July 29, 2005
Monday, July 25, 2005
me like choochoo
One more thing about the blood that runs through my veins… I love public transportation.. It’s a really strange but interesting phenomenon, but there’s such a sense of satisfaction of being able to travel around a city or across a country with a little laminated card in your hand. There’s nothing like the feeling of accomplishment when you’ve mastered the public transportation system in another country/language – a challenge worthy of a celebratory pint (sounds like the ‘pin’ in pinch, but with a ‘t’ instead of a ‘ch’).
City living is sublime with the luxury of a decent metro and bus lines. Parking is always an issue or a headache, and when you live in a city where 15 dollars for an hour for parking is a bargain; then your feet, and that little laminated card, ticket stub or dirty copper token sounds really good to me.. Getting rid of my car was such a liberating feeling: no need for gas, maintenance, registrations, cleaning, insurance, taxes, scraping off the ice and snow, brake pads, fluid changes, paint jobs, changing tires, checking tire pressure, service, scratches, dents, broken side mirrors – nothing…
Get on that metro, take three stops down, change stations, catch the other train on the other line heading west – two more stops and BABAM (Sami Style), you’re in the middle of wherever you want to be… walk around, you want to take a cab, no problem, you’re mobile now – you can do anything – no need to have to walk back to the parking lot to get the car to head it over to another parking lot, or meter, or in front of a hydrant...
Think of all the random people you see on the subway – bums, businessmen, mothers, children, students, seniors, hoodlums, tourists, all sorts of people including you and me. Buddhists, Muslims, Atheists, Christians, Jews, Hindus, Scientologists, etc – we’re all taking the metro to get to a specific point… There’s just so much going on the train… Buskers playing all that music you love, vendors selling coffee, flowers, fruit, whatever… All those advertisements and billboards – I don’t think I’ve ever gotten on or waited for a train, and not been amused…
I loved the little commuter tricks you knew about… during the winter time, the best place to sit on the bus was in the back, because the back seats were on top of the engine and the seats were always nice and warm. Summertime, avoid the back seats at all costs. The other side exit at the station where it didn’t feel like there were a hundred people going up or down the stairs. The on your toes skip to avoid puddles of piss. The exact spot where the train stops when it pulls into the station. Just little tricks that make your commute a little slicker…
Commuter rails - wow, linking the suburbs and towns to the cities, absolutely incredible. You get on the train, sit down, the conductor comes, you either have to your card or you pay for your ticket and that’s it… a couple of stops and there you have it, you’re at the parking lot walking to your car to take your 10 minute drive home – just in time for dinner. Getting on the commuter rail makes you see how many people live outside but work in the city everyday, so easy.. Sure it can be a hassle if you have an hour or more commute each way – but I loved reading the paper in the morning, a super-power nap, listening to music, a book perhaps, and even just taking some time to daze off in the morning to collect your daydreams and get ready for the day… I always saved something for the trip home, some footie news, that book, de-stressing, or just sinking in your seat and not having to do anything for the next hour till you make it to your stop.. The commuter rail only worked if you left at a set time.. Working late would suck – doable – but still suck.. I feel for you workaholic commuters…
The downside to public transportation was that sometimes their timing would be off… luckily enough; it’s not really that bad - once you have their schedule - you’re all set… I love bus stops with the schedule posted at the stop – such valuable information. Another downside to public transportation: Rush Hour traffic… it’s unavoidable – but everything comes at a price…
I’ve had the pleasure of utilizing a number of public transportation systems all over the world – credit is given to where credit is due – the Behemoth: The London Underground… 6 Zones, enough train stations that you’ll never even visit, enough subway lines to paint a rainbow. It’s affectionately known as the tube –with the overplayed recording “mind the gap” – The tube has so much history connecting one of the largest most cosmopolitan cities on this planet. This is the place where buskers thrive, advertisers salivate over the foot traffic, and vendors make a living. The tube is a part of life there that many people have just accepted as a component of your daily routine you cannot do without. Make no mistake, the London Underground has withstood a lot: People were evacuated underground during the World War II aerial bombings – People braved the IRA bombings – and they will brave these gutless terrorist attacks. Should people change a part of their lives because of the horrendous act committed on July 7th, 2005? No Fucking way… I’ll be damned before anyone gets between me and my love for taking the subway – You can’t let them think they’ve succeeded – it’s what their violently brainwashed & totally fucked minds are looking for…
I stand by the people of London by sticking my middle finger in defiance to these fucking terrorists – and only hope that with our stand together we realize that you cannot hate an entire religion on the actions of some extremists.
City living is sublime with the luxury of a decent metro and bus lines. Parking is always an issue or a headache, and when you live in a city where 15 dollars for an hour for parking is a bargain; then your feet, and that little laminated card, ticket stub or dirty copper token sounds really good to me.. Getting rid of my car was such a liberating feeling: no need for gas, maintenance, registrations, cleaning, insurance, taxes, scraping off the ice and snow, brake pads, fluid changes, paint jobs, changing tires, checking tire pressure, service, scratches, dents, broken side mirrors – nothing…
Get on that metro, take three stops down, change stations, catch the other train on the other line heading west – two more stops and BABAM (Sami Style), you’re in the middle of wherever you want to be… walk around, you want to take a cab, no problem, you’re mobile now – you can do anything – no need to have to walk back to the parking lot to get the car to head it over to another parking lot, or meter, or in front of a hydrant...
Think of all the random people you see on the subway – bums, businessmen, mothers, children, students, seniors, hoodlums, tourists, all sorts of people including you and me. Buddhists, Muslims, Atheists, Christians, Jews, Hindus, Scientologists, etc – we’re all taking the metro to get to a specific point… There’s just so much going on the train… Buskers playing all that music you love, vendors selling coffee, flowers, fruit, whatever… All those advertisements and billboards – I don’t think I’ve ever gotten on or waited for a train, and not been amused…
I loved the little commuter tricks you knew about… during the winter time, the best place to sit on the bus was in the back, because the back seats were on top of the engine and the seats were always nice and warm. Summertime, avoid the back seats at all costs. The other side exit at the station where it didn’t feel like there were a hundred people going up or down the stairs. The on your toes skip to avoid puddles of piss. The exact spot where the train stops when it pulls into the station. Just little tricks that make your commute a little slicker…
Commuter rails - wow, linking the suburbs and towns to the cities, absolutely incredible. You get on the train, sit down, the conductor comes, you either have to your card or you pay for your ticket and that’s it… a couple of stops and there you have it, you’re at the parking lot walking to your car to take your 10 minute drive home – just in time for dinner. Getting on the commuter rail makes you see how many people live outside but work in the city everyday, so easy.. Sure it can be a hassle if you have an hour or more commute each way – but I loved reading the paper in the morning, a super-power nap, listening to music, a book perhaps, and even just taking some time to daze off in the morning to collect your daydreams and get ready for the day… I always saved something for the trip home, some footie news, that book, de-stressing, or just sinking in your seat and not having to do anything for the next hour till you make it to your stop.. The commuter rail only worked if you left at a set time.. Working late would suck – doable – but still suck.. I feel for you workaholic commuters…
The downside to public transportation was that sometimes their timing would be off… luckily enough; it’s not really that bad - once you have their schedule - you’re all set… I love bus stops with the schedule posted at the stop – such valuable information. Another downside to public transportation: Rush Hour traffic… it’s unavoidable – but everything comes at a price…
I’ve had the pleasure of utilizing a number of public transportation systems all over the world – credit is given to where credit is due – the Behemoth: The London Underground… 6 Zones, enough train stations that you’ll never even visit, enough subway lines to paint a rainbow. It’s affectionately known as the tube –with the overplayed recording “mind the gap” – The tube has so much history connecting one of the largest most cosmopolitan cities on this planet. This is the place where buskers thrive, advertisers salivate over the foot traffic, and vendors make a living. The tube is a part of life there that many people have just accepted as a component of your daily routine you cannot do without. Make no mistake, the London Underground has withstood a lot: People were evacuated underground during the World War II aerial bombings – People braved the IRA bombings – and they will brave these gutless terrorist attacks. Should people change a part of their lives because of the horrendous act committed on July 7th, 2005? No Fucking way… I’ll be damned before anyone gets between me and my love for taking the subway – You can’t let them think they’ve succeeded – it’s what their violently brainwashed & totally fucked minds are looking for…
I stand by the people of London by sticking my middle finger in defiance to these fucking terrorists – and only hope that with our stand together we realize that you cannot hate an entire religion on the actions of some extremists.
Friday, July 22, 2005
forget you
thanks to DAR and Slonk for this wonderful translation of drunk arabic aangrish poetry:
forget you
forget you, how can i forget you?
how can i forget your height?
how can i keeeb you from my sight?
forget you, how can i forget you?
how can i forget the moon and the sky?
how can i forget the gazelle jumbing high?
forget you, how can i forget you?
you are for me , like the fish is for the sea
I am for you, like the sock is for the shoe
forget you, how can i forget you?
tphoo alaaaay if I forget you...
forget you
forget you, how can i forget you?
how can i forget your height?
how can i keeeb you from my sight?
forget you, how can i forget you?
how can i forget the moon and the sky?
how can i forget the gazelle jumbing high?
forget you, how can i forget you?
you are for me , like the fish is for the sea
I am for you, like the sock is for the shoe
forget you, how can i forget you?
tphoo alaaaay if I forget you...
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
I needed to believe in something
Inspired by Bike shed’s post here - imagination - a deep love for this place - and the Chemical Brothers tune: Believe.
It was a Friday… the weather was unbelievably wonderful and I got conned into running “some” errands with a friend… Loaded the cd changer with some new music and off we went… I don’t need to tell you, Bahrain, on a Friday afternoon, with magnificent weather is just a wonderful place to be…
Driving along the new flyover in front of the Seef Mall I couldn’t help but notice the progress taking shape… We have begun our transformation from a small island nation to a bustling metropolis. My mind drifted away to what life could be like in the next 10 to 20 years… Y’see a lot of people are upset with the skyline, atrocious buildings going up, road works, a big ‘what’s going to happen to us?’, blah blah blah.. Let me tell you what I saw…
A real metropolitan area, with different districts, improved infrastructure, a developed sense of modern civilization – a place to call home in the 21st century… Driving past the Seef district heading towards Manama, I saw the shopping malls and the gold domes of the Seef Mall on the left. I could see the buildings on the Seaside with their high rises and offices… The HSBC building to join the Al Moayyed tower in the Seef district’s rising skyline. The thought of having a number of high rises has me cheering – it’s time we joined the international community in terms of growth and development. The new City Center shopping mall coming up on the left, yes we will have 5 shopping malls in the same area, too much you say? Why not I think… With residential buildings, commercial offices, shops, etc all opening up, the Seef stands to become the developed commerce center on the island. On the right hand side, there’s the Bahrain Mall, the Dana Mall, the new Chamber of Commerce, and even more buildings coming up with more residential apartments. People will eventually have to start considering living in apartments due to the diminishing space and increasing population. Shaikh Khalifa Bin Salman Highway will be one of the most important strips in Bahrain, roaring development - commerce and a new look to our future.
The Diplomatic Area: In the distance, the Diplomatic Area and our bustling financial center making up another expanding skyline… The two main buildings of the Bahrain Financial Harbor right on the water’s edge welcoming visitors by sea (build it and they will come). The NBB Building, towering over the old souk, representing the spine of the Bahraini commercial banks with the nation’s flag on top, a beacon for everyone to see. The new World Trade Center announcing our membership to the developed world – Two sails reaching for the sky tasting the Arabian sun. The area will forever be busy with its offices, insurance companies, offshore banks, investment companies, law firms, ministries, and embassies. The Diplomatic Area is a our version of the financial district – I look forward to biking around on a Friday when the streets are practically empty – as should you…
Muharraq: Busaiteen is such prime location, great view of the sea extending out to the Seef district… With Muharraq – I see it changing anyway it chooses… I love that island – it develops traditions in its own way & who am I to mess with it…
Juffair: Once all the buildings are up, the construction has been tamed and the streets and sidewalks are paved - making kicked up sand and dust a thing of the past - I can definitely see a wharf built on the water’s edge, with shops and a marina there for people to use… Think about the image for a second, you’ve got all these high rise buildings overlooking the water, there’s a boardwalk with a nice wharf, and some restaurants and a little marina there – make it easy and cheap for people who go fishing to dock their boats – Docks are beautiful with their own type of charm and by inviting the local fisherman to be a part of this new type of development we continue to retain our traditions, we’re just using modern amenities to facilitate their livelihood/passion. Give the residents of Juffair and Manama a place to take a stroll in the evenings and inviting other people to enjoy the beauty of waterfront dining/ shopping/ café/whatever your heart pleases…
Adliya District: A multi-level centralized parking lot with special rates to residents in the neighborhood; metered street parking and special parking zones for residents – strictly enforced by the traffic police, with CCTV to deter any crime. Property developed from behind the zoes/lilou area extending all the way upstairs downstairs region filled with various cafes and restaurants. Following the Riwaq example, more art galleries open up: showcasing the works of local talent. A bookshop or two. Local and International designers opening up boutiques… retaining the small buildings architecture and working with it allowing Adliya to preserve its neighborhood promenade feel. I can just see it all, streets with huge canopies tied to streetlights, providing shade for the casual strollers. Take it one step further… having water misters run under these canopies providing our casual strollers with some pleasant mist to keep cool during warmer days. Heading over to Adliya to pick up your newspaper, have a coffee and meet up with friends never felt so cool… You get a little peckish; there are a bunch of world-class restaurants there to satisfy your hunger.
Qufool: I love this neighborhood, filled with small buildings and close-knit neighborhood quaintness… Imagine the area renovated and rented out.. I can see it being the starter family neighborhood… newlyweds looking to stay close to the city, yet branching out in kitschy one or two bedroom apartments.. Interesting buildings cool roof deck gatherings… You develop a neighborhood feel to the place with your local grocer, butcher, frommagerie - ok maybe I’m going a little too far, but this can all happen, no reason why it can’t…
The Bahrain International Circuit and the development South: Racing is in our blood, whether it be Horses, Boats, Bikes or Cars… The circuit is a step in the right direction for us, bringing attention to our motor sport fever, and letting us vent out our passion in a controlled and professional environment. People have different views on the financial benefit of the F1, give this time, people will catch a serious F1 fever on this island & with a bridge linking us to Saudi & Qatar (in the not too distant future) – we will be the middle east’s link to racing. Once a year, the entire world turns to us for a weekend because of a race – you don’t you think that’s amazing? This is our chance to show the world that Bahrain stands in a class of its own. The new trend in property development - the area looks to get a lot busier… Our beaches get developed – Al Jazayer beach gets a new facelift (I’m not talking about fake sand and a modified landscape) – I’m talking about having a strong push to clean our shores, imposing serious fines for people who litter (I MEAN SERIOUS: BD 100 per offence – force people to accept not littering to pay a fine); I’m talking about bringing Marine Biologists and environmental experts to help us rebuild our marine life… bring back the corals… I want to be able to take my kids snorkeling and let them see what fish live in our waters- don’t you?
A real two level ring road around the island, with exits coming on and off – making your full circle trip around the island much faster. A bridge connecting Bahrain to Qatar, adding to our causeway with Saudi Arabia – an Island nation connected to the two major industrial powerhouses in the area. Many other countries boast to be the pearl of the gulf or the pride of the gulf; but what they cannot boast is prime geographic location… Bahrain will be connecting the Gulf States together… Saudi Arabia will become the prime producer of petrochemicals in the coming 10 years, Qatar will become the one of the main natural gas suppliers and will all these liquefied natural gas projects and the petrochemicals (mega projects) – I can’t see Bahrain not participating in this development and remain eco-friendly. Think about it, these huge trucks transporting all sorts of goods all across the GCC, using Bahrain as a central hub, riding along our efficient ring road making transportation more feasible and easy. It’s not that I can only see our development through the help of our neighbors and their resources – think about the tourism, think about how easy it will be for an inter GCC road trip. Bahrain will become the linkup to the GCC… A trans-GCC railway… Invite small to medium enterprises to come, setup shop and use Bahrain as a hub to export to the region – now tell me don’t you think that’s a good idea?
Bringing our heads down from the clouds… This is the beauty of Bahrain, a future is always there and always promising – we have existed for centuries – we have always been an integral part of history due to our location and we will continue to be a fundamental cog in the Middle East… Realistically, we do not have the manpower or the resources of our neighbors – but we have faith aided with a progressive and thinking population… We cannot let ignorance cloud our thoughts.. Dammit – The Mesopotamians – the First recorded civilization in history used to come and vacation here! We have seen empires rise and empires fall – we will continue to stand… This is my Bahrain and I believe…
It was a Friday… the weather was unbelievably wonderful and I got conned into running “some” errands with a friend… Loaded the cd changer with some new music and off we went… I don’t need to tell you, Bahrain, on a Friday afternoon, with magnificent weather is just a wonderful place to be…
Driving along the new flyover in front of the Seef Mall I couldn’t help but notice the progress taking shape… We have begun our transformation from a small island nation to a bustling metropolis. My mind drifted away to what life could be like in the next 10 to 20 years… Y’see a lot of people are upset with the skyline, atrocious buildings going up, road works, a big ‘what’s going to happen to us?’, blah blah blah.. Let me tell you what I saw…
A real metropolitan area, with different districts, improved infrastructure, a developed sense of modern civilization – a place to call home in the 21st century… Driving past the Seef district heading towards Manama, I saw the shopping malls and the gold domes of the Seef Mall on the left. I could see the buildings on the Seaside with their high rises and offices… The HSBC building to join the Al Moayyed tower in the Seef district’s rising skyline. The thought of having a number of high rises has me cheering – it’s time we joined the international community in terms of growth and development. The new City Center shopping mall coming up on the left, yes we will have 5 shopping malls in the same area, too much you say? Why not I think… With residential buildings, commercial offices, shops, etc all opening up, the Seef stands to become the developed commerce center on the island. On the right hand side, there’s the Bahrain Mall, the Dana Mall, the new Chamber of Commerce, and even more buildings coming up with more residential apartments. People will eventually have to start considering living in apartments due to the diminishing space and increasing population. Shaikh Khalifa Bin Salman Highway will be one of the most important strips in Bahrain, roaring development - commerce and a new look to our future.
The Diplomatic Area: In the distance, the Diplomatic Area and our bustling financial center making up another expanding skyline… The two main buildings of the Bahrain Financial Harbor right on the water’s edge welcoming visitors by sea (build it and they will come). The NBB Building, towering over the old souk, representing the spine of the Bahraini commercial banks with the nation’s flag on top, a beacon for everyone to see. The new World Trade Center announcing our membership to the developed world – Two sails reaching for the sky tasting the Arabian sun. The area will forever be busy with its offices, insurance companies, offshore banks, investment companies, law firms, ministries, and embassies. The Diplomatic Area is a our version of the financial district – I look forward to biking around on a Friday when the streets are practically empty – as should you…
Muharraq: Busaiteen is such prime location, great view of the sea extending out to the Seef district… With Muharraq – I see it changing anyway it chooses… I love that island – it develops traditions in its own way & who am I to mess with it…
Juffair: Once all the buildings are up, the construction has been tamed and the streets and sidewalks are paved - making kicked up sand and dust a thing of the past - I can definitely see a wharf built on the water’s edge, with shops and a marina there for people to use… Think about the image for a second, you’ve got all these high rise buildings overlooking the water, there’s a boardwalk with a nice wharf, and some restaurants and a little marina there – make it easy and cheap for people who go fishing to dock their boats – Docks are beautiful with their own type of charm and by inviting the local fisherman to be a part of this new type of development we continue to retain our traditions, we’re just using modern amenities to facilitate their livelihood/passion. Give the residents of Juffair and Manama a place to take a stroll in the evenings and inviting other people to enjoy the beauty of waterfront dining/ shopping/ café/whatever your heart pleases…
Adliya District: A multi-level centralized parking lot with special rates to residents in the neighborhood; metered street parking and special parking zones for residents – strictly enforced by the traffic police, with CCTV to deter any crime. Property developed from behind the zoes/lilou area extending all the way upstairs downstairs region filled with various cafes and restaurants. Following the Riwaq example, more art galleries open up: showcasing the works of local talent. A bookshop or two. Local and International designers opening up boutiques… retaining the small buildings architecture and working with it allowing Adliya to preserve its neighborhood promenade feel. I can just see it all, streets with huge canopies tied to streetlights, providing shade for the casual strollers. Take it one step further… having water misters run under these canopies providing our casual strollers with some pleasant mist to keep cool during warmer days. Heading over to Adliya to pick up your newspaper, have a coffee and meet up with friends never felt so cool… You get a little peckish; there are a bunch of world-class restaurants there to satisfy your hunger.
Qufool: I love this neighborhood, filled with small buildings and close-knit neighborhood quaintness… Imagine the area renovated and rented out.. I can see it being the starter family neighborhood… newlyweds looking to stay close to the city, yet branching out in kitschy one or two bedroom apartments.. Interesting buildings cool roof deck gatherings… You develop a neighborhood feel to the place with your local grocer, butcher, frommagerie - ok maybe I’m going a little too far, but this can all happen, no reason why it can’t…
The Bahrain International Circuit and the development South: Racing is in our blood, whether it be Horses, Boats, Bikes or Cars… The circuit is a step in the right direction for us, bringing attention to our motor sport fever, and letting us vent out our passion in a controlled and professional environment. People have different views on the financial benefit of the F1, give this time, people will catch a serious F1 fever on this island & with a bridge linking us to Saudi & Qatar (in the not too distant future) – we will be the middle east’s link to racing. Once a year, the entire world turns to us for a weekend because of a race – you don’t you think that’s amazing? This is our chance to show the world that Bahrain stands in a class of its own. The new trend in property development - the area looks to get a lot busier… Our beaches get developed – Al Jazayer beach gets a new facelift (I’m not talking about fake sand and a modified landscape) – I’m talking about having a strong push to clean our shores, imposing serious fines for people who litter (I MEAN SERIOUS: BD 100 per offence – force people to accept not littering to pay a fine); I’m talking about bringing Marine Biologists and environmental experts to help us rebuild our marine life… bring back the corals… I want to be able to take my kids snorkeling and let them see what fish live in our waters- don’t you?
A real two level ring road around the island, with exits coming on and off – making your full circle trip around the island much faster. A bridge connecting Bahrain to Qatar, adding to our causeway with Saudi Arabia – an Island nation connected to the two major industrial powerhouses in the area. Many other countries boast to be the pearl of the gulf or the pride of the gulf; but what they cannot boast is prime geographic location… Bahrain will be connecting the Gulf States together… Saudi Arabia will become the prime producer of petrochemicals in the coming 10 years, Qatar will become the one of the main natural gas suppliers and will all these liquefied natural gas projects and the petrochemicals (mega projects) – I can’t see Bahrain not participating in this development and remain eco-friendly. Think about it, these huge trucks transporting all sorts of goods all across the GCC, using Bahrain as a central hub, riding along our efficient ring road making transportation more feasible and easy. It’s not that I can only see our development through the help of our neighbors and their resources – think about the tourism, think about how easy it will be for an inter GCC road trip. Bahrain will become the linkup to the GCC… A trans-GCC railway… Invite small to medium enterprises to come, setup shop and use Bahrain as a hub to export to the region – now tell me don’t you think that’s a good idea?
Bringing our heads down from the clouds… This is the beauty of Bahrain, a future is always there and always promising – we have existed for centuries – we have always been an integral part of history due to our location and we will continue to be a fundamental cog in the Middle East… Realistically, we do not have the manpower or the resources of our neighbors – but we have faith aided with a progressive and thinking population… We cannot let ignorance cloud our thoughts.. Dammit – The Mesopotamians – the First recorded civilization in history used to come and vacation here! We have seen empires rise and empires fall – we will continue to stand… This is my Bahrain and I believe…
Sunday, July 10, 2005
cinema pingpong (the scousers get it)
I love movies… There’s nothing I enjoy more than being able to tune out for a couple of hours and just follow the story of alien invaders, a female boxer, a tasteless comedy, a gut wrenching drama – whatever you want… Having become a seasoned cinemagoer and an ex-gold card carrying member of Hollywood video (that gold rental card does wonders with the ladies), I’ve figured out what pisses me off when watching a movie and what I can avoid to ensure a decent movie experience. I have a pattern of things I do at the movies, I try to get there slightly early to ensure a good seat, fully loaded with snacks and supplies, a pre-flick slash, I’ll even bring a sweater to the movie with me to combat the air conditioners…
Modus operandi at the cinema involves disbanding into smaller tactically driven units. One team will wait in line to pick up the tickets and pick seats not too far from the screen – the other team will line up to get snacks – there are stand ins waiting in the wings to step in if nature calls while you’re waiting in line.
I just thought I’d share some movie tips and annoyances that you might also harbor – I know I’m not alone on this one…
Obnoxious assholes at the movie theater – these people suck… These are the budding comedians that feel the need to adlib and try out their material in the middle of your movie experience. Hombre, no one is interested in your comments, keep your incredible sense of humor to yourself and save it for the stage. A friend once came over to my place after the cinema but couldn’t tell me how the movie was because some obnoxious person would not Keep quiet in the theater, and the police had to be brought in to remove this punk… You’d have to be on some serious hallucinogenics to be oblivious to everyone in the movie theater telling you to shut the hell up… the thing I don’t understand is that if you’re going to take a hallucinogenic and be oblivious to the outside world – why on earth would you go to the movie theater? If you’re planning on getting drunk and being loud, then the movie theater has to be the dumbest place to go… Some people like to go against the grain and do “their” thing – well allow me to tell you that your thing sucks fucknut..
I just watched the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy this weekend – and thanks to a cackle of the most inappropriately dressed for the cinema (more on that later) bitches (yes bitches, there’s no other way of referring to them – well maybe the one that kept on apologizing for her friends – she can be free from the bitch title) – I couldn’t enjoy the movie.. The head bitch, with her short dress and matching ethnic trinkets barely covering up her hippo thighs - starts talking because she just can’t seem to grasp the plot that Douglas Adams has been revered for… This, (again I’m sorry for the language but everyone in that cinema will be able to back me up on this one) BITCH, sat there talked on her phone, decided to play around with the flashlight on her cell phone taking a look at the movie goers, and started talking about how she lent this guy money and he wasn’t going to pay her back (maybe cause you’re the spokesperson for STDs you fucking inconsiderate douche bag). Walking around with her pretentious supermodel (I just came in from Milan where I was officially made the “&” in Dolce & Gabbana) – yet she has the class, the looks, and attitude of a fat phone sex operator working the graveyard shift servicing drunk bastards with nothing at the end of the night but their dick in their hand… Somebody went and called the usher in cause they couldn’t believe that it was a woman who was being so obnoxious (living in Bahrain, it’s usually a man who’s the obnoxious prick at a movie) – the cackle was asked to grab a hold of themselves but nothing came out of it. I’m praying for warts in your not too distant future. ok –that’s out of my system.. lady, you were a fucking bitch… ok, now it’s really gone…
Nonchalant moviegoers – I avoid these people like the plague… This is the person that when you tell them, “be there at 4:30- the movie starts then, they’ll show up at around 4:45, and you’re stuck waiting for them because you’ve got their ticket… or lets say you’re running late to the movies and there’s that nonchalant moviegoer who has to go and get popcorn and snacks.. These are the people that will tell you “don’t worry there’s at least 10 minutes of upcoming releases” – and then when you walk into the movie, you realize you’ve just missed the quintessential point to the film that would have answered so many questions you will have in the next 45 minutes to an hour…
Censoring – I understand Bahrain is a Muslim nation and that there might be children watching the film… nudity is forbidden, and I can respect that. But why are you going to rate the film if you’re just going to snip it up? Why must my intelligence and maturity be compromised because the censorship authority must dictate what I can and can’t watch at the movie theater? Many teens, growing up in high schools can probably teach the leading actors about to have a moment a thing or two. We can’t hide this stuff anymore from the kids; you might as well start talking to them about it before it’s too late… It’s not the pervert inside me that is complaining about the kissing (he is satisfied with copious amounts of pornography on the internet at the tip of his fingers) – it’s the moviegoer… I can’t tell you how many times the credits would roll around, and they’re the type of credits where they show you the actor or actress and have his/her name under. There would be a couple of shots of actors from the movie that I had no idea who they were… I’m talking about entire scenes cut – for what reason? I don’t know… If you consider us adults, then treat us like adults… just because you feel that religion doesn’t promote this, and the scene interferes with your view of religion then don’t go to the movie theater and don’t let your children go – the rest of us enjoy watching films and we want to see how the story unfurls…
Talkies - These people drive me mad… They love to talk during the movie… I can understand if you missed a line, or something hasn’t registered and you need to ask a clarification question – that’s cool… but if you’re expecting me to explain the plot twists or character development or a question that will require an answer of more than 5 words – that’s un-cool man, really un-cool… You can’t expect me to sit there and be your personal movie buff; watch it in silence and then ask your questions when the movie’s over, who knows, maybe you’ll figure it out for yourself. I can’t stand people that actually don’t have a problem with talking during the movie… I mean, what could have possibly happened from the time you were outside and could talk to your friend freely, to now, when you’re inside the movie theater? The cell phone is another enemy of mine at the cinema.. I mean honestly, you saw the sign – turn off the cell phone or keep it on mute… I understand the might be an emergency, but that’s what the vibrating alert is for right? Do you really think me and everyone else at the theater bought tickets so we can listen to your unbelievably uneventful life? Talking on the phone, is one of the most annoying things you might have to endure at a movie theater here... cut it out… If your friend calls, then don’t answer, leave your phone in the car, isn’t that a little liberating? For those 2 measly hours, no one can contact you?
Cinema Attire - One of the best thing about living in the US was being able to catch all the new releases when they came out.. Saturday afternoons were reserved for the cinema… What I always found strange is the way people dressed for the cinema… Casual, relaxed, people on dates dressed up smartly.. Then, I hate to admit it, you had the Arabs.. I’m not saying all Arabs, because there were many whom remained in their university sweatpants, jeans, sneakers, flipflops, and baseball cap… But there were some and I mean some of the women that would get decked out: pull out the latest thousand dollar handbag made by a Chinese French designer that doesn’t have a name (it’s pronounced more like a sound effect)… throw on their flashy designer jeans (the jeans that go out of their way to remind that they’re designer).. Makeup that would make you think MAC was having a “going out of business sale”.. Do you know how incredibly stupid that looked? A movie theater? Where it was going to be dark? Granted sometimes these women had gone out to dinner beforehand and had a need to get dressed up… The other women that really had no reason – dressed up because they wanted to be seen looking really “hot and trendy“ in the darkness of a movie theater – has that sunk in yet? The darkness of a movie theater. Anyways, you can dress anyway you feel like it, and if you could afford to drop that much cash on a new weekly wardrobe, then all the power to you… I just thought it was kinda odd that you’d get dolled up for the movies…
This whole thing started because of that cackle of disgusting, inconsiderate, ill-mannered and probably ho-ing group of women that should have read the synopsis on the Hitchhiker’s guide to the Galaxy before they decided to ruin the movie for everyone in the cinema… I still can’t tell if I liked the movie or not – I think I’m going to have to watch it again…
Modus operandi at the cinema involves disbanding into smaller tactically driven units. One team will wait in line to pick up the tickets and pick seats not too far from the screen – the other team will line up to get snacks – there are stand ins waiting in the wings to step in if nature calls while you’re waiting in line.
I just thought I’d share some movie tips and annoyances that you might also harbor – I know I’m not alone on this one…
Obnoxious assholes at the movie theater – these people suck… These are the budding comedians that feel the need to adlib and try out their material in the middle of your movie experience. Hombre, no one is interested in your comments, keep your incredible sense of humor to yourself and save it for the stage. A friend once came over to my place after the cinema but couldn’t tell me how the movie was because some obnoxious person would not Keep quiet in the theater, and the police had to be brought in to remove this punk… You’d have to be on some serious hallucinogenics to be oblivious to everyone in the movie theater telling you to shut the hell up… the thing I don’t understand is that if you’re going to take a hallucinogenic and be oblivious to the outside world – why on earth would you go to the movie theater? If you’re planning on getting drunk and being loud, then the movie theater has to be the dumbest place to go… Some people like to go against the grain and do “their” thing – well allow me to tell you that your thing sucks fucknut..
I just watched the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy this weekend – and thanks to a cackle of the most inappropriately dressed for the cinema (more on that later) bitches (yes bitches, there’s no other way of referring to them – well maybe the one that kept on apologizing for her friends – she can be free from the bitch title) – I couldn’t enjoy the movie.. The head bitch, with her short dress and matching ethnic trinkets barely covering up her hippo thighs - starts talking because she just can’t seem to grasp the plot that Douglas Adams has been revered for… This, (again I’m sorry for the language but everyone in that cinema will be able to back me up on this one) BITCH, sat there talked on her phone, decided to play around with the flashlight on her cell phone taking a look at the movie goers, and started talking about how she lent this guy money and he wasn’t going to pay her back (maybe cause you’re the spokesperson for STDs you fucking inconsiderate douche bag). Walking around with her pretentious supermodel (I just came in from Milan where I was officially made the “&” in Dolce & Gabbana) – yet she has the class, the looks, and attitude of a fat phone sex operator working the graveyard shift servicing drunk bastards with nothing at the end of the night but their dick in their hand… Somebody went and called the usher in cause they couldn’t believe that it was a woman who was being so obnoxious (living in Bahrain, it’s usually a man who’s the obnoxious prick at a movie) – the cackle was asked to grab a hold of themselves but nothing came out of it. I’m praying for warts in your not too distant future. ok –that’s out of my system.. lady, you were a fucking bitch… ok, now it’s really gone…
Nonchalant moviegoers – I avoid these people like the plague… This is the person that when you tell them, “be there at 4:30- the movie starts then, they’ll show up at around 4:45, and you’re stuck waiting for them because you’ve got their ticket… or lets say you’re running late to the movies and there’s that nonchalant moviegoer who has to go and get popcorn and snacks.. These are the people that will tell you “don’t worry there’s at least 10 minutes of upcoming releases” – and then when you walk into the movie, you realize you’ve just missed the quintessential point to the film that would have answered so many questions you will have in the next 45 minutes to an hour…
Censoring – I understand Bahrain is a Muslim nation and that there might be children watching the film… nudity is forbidden, and I can respect that. But why are you going to rate the film if you’re just going to snip it up? Why must my intelligence and maturity be compromised because the censorship authority must dictate what I can and can’t watch at the movie theater? Many teens, growing up in high schools can probably teach the leading actors about to have a moment a thing or two. We can’t hide this stuff anymore from the kids; you might as well start talking to them about it before it’s too late… It’s not the pervert inside me that is complaining about the kissing (he is satisfied with copious amounts of pornography on the internet at the tip of his fingers) – it’s the moviegoer… I can’t tell you how many times the credits would roll around, and they’re the type of credits where they show you the actor or actress and have his/her name under. There would be a couple of shots of actors from the movie that I had no idea who they were… I’m talking about entire scenes cut – for what reason? I don’t know… If you consider us adults, then treat us like adults… just because you feel that religion doesn’t promote this, and the scene interferes with your view of religion then don’t go to the movie theater and don’t let your children go – the rest of us enjoy watching films and we want to see how the story unfurls…
Talkies - These people drive me mad… They love to talk during the movie… I can understand if you missed a line, or something hasn’t registered and you need to ask a clarification question – that’s cool… but if you’re expecting me to explain the plot twists or character development or a question that will require an answer of more than 5 words – that’s un-cool man, really un-cool… You can’t expect me to sit there and be your personal movie buff; watch it in silence and then ask your questions when the movie’s over, who knows, maybe you’ll figure it out for yourself. I can’t stand people that actually don’t have a problem with talking during the movie… I mean, what could have possibly happened from the time you were outside and could talk to your friend freely, to now, when you’re inside the movie theater? The cell phone is another enemy of mine at the cinema.. I mean honestly, you saw the sign – turn off the cell phone or keep it on mute… I understand the might be an emergency, but that’s what the vibrating alert is for right? Do you really think me and everyone else at the theater bought tickets so we can listen to your unbelievably uneventful life? Talking on the phone, is one of the most annoying things you might have to endure at a movie theater here... cut it out… If your friend calls, then don’t answer, leave your phone in the car, isn’t that a little liberating? For those 2 measly hours, no one can contact you?
Cinema Attire - One of the best thing about living in the US was being able to catch all the new releases when they came out.. Saturday afternoons were reserved for the cinema… What I always found strange is the way people dressed for the cinema… Casual, relaxed, people on dates dressed up smartly.. Then, I hate to admit it, you had the Arabs.. I’m not saying all Arabs, because there were many whom remained in their university sweatpants, jeans, sneakers, flipflops, and baseball cap… But there were some and I mean some of the women that would get decked out: pull out the latest thousand dollar handbag made by a Chinese French designer that doesn’t have a name (it’s pronounced more like a sound effect)… throw on their flashy designer jeans (the jeans that go out of their way to remind that they’re designer).. Makeup that would make you think MAC was having a “going out of business sale”.. Do you know how incredibly stupid that looked? A movie theater? Where it was going to be dark? Granted sometimes these women had gone out to dinner beforehand and had a need to get dressed up… The other women that really had no reason – dressed up because they wanted to be seen looking really “hot and trendy“ in the darkness of a movie theater – has that sunk in yet? The darkness of a movie theater. Anyways, you can dress anyway you feel like it, and if you could afford to drop that much cash on a new weekly wardrobe, then all the power to you… I just thought it was kinda odd that you’d get dolled up for the movies…
This whole thing started because of that cackle of disgusting, inconsiderate, ill-mannered and probably ho-ing group of women that should have read the synopsis on the Hitchhiker’s guide to the Galaxy before they decided to ruin the movie for everyone in the cinema… I still can’t tell if I liked the movie or not – I think I’m going to have to watch it again…
Monday, July 04, 2005
An exercise in 5 minute ranting…
Time: 9:28 AM
Do you ever wonder what the deal is with the Special Bahraini Mix? Everything we eat or drink, we have to have a Special Bahraini mix for it… you eat a Shawarma, there’s a Special Bahraini mix for the shawarma where they add Crystal hot sauce, extra chilies, and French Fries (but I love my Shawarma the way it’s normally served)… you want juice, then there’s the special Bahraini mix for juice, it’s the exact same cocktail, but its got one additional fruit making it the Special Bahraini mix – you can’t even tell the difference from the other juices, but at least you’re drinking the Special Bahraini mix… at my office they have filter coffee, instant coffee and tea… all three are mixed together along with coffee mate and some cardamom evaporated milk to come up with the Special Bahraini Mix - who decided all of this, I'm not really sure - but it's called the Special Bahraini Mix on my floor… You want to eat some grills (Mashwiyaat), there’s always some Special Bahraini Mix… The funny thing is whenever you go to one of these places and ask the guy what’s good, he’ll tell you, “you try Special Bahraini mix” – and then I say “yalla – bring for me Special Bahraini mix”… you know what I get after that? Chicken and beef on a skewer, or a shawarma over stuffed with beef and chicken.. This is the crafty work of some fella who wants to fool people by telling them this is the way Bahraini’s love their food – all hashed together and mixed up, it’s the Bahraini way – chicken, meat and cheese all cooked together … and the thing is, I get suckered into it all the time - why? I have no idea why, it just happens… I will still probably get suckered into the Special Bahraini mix the next time I feel a little peckish…
Time: 9:34 AM (so it took 6 minutes - sue me)
Do you ever wonder what the deal is with the Special Bahraini Mix? Everything we eat or drink, we have to have a Special Bahraini mix for it… you eat a Shawarma, there’s a Special Bahraini mix for the shawarma where they add Crystal hot sauce, extra chilies, and French Fries (but I love my Shawarma the way it’s normally served)… you want juice, then there’s the special Bahraini mix for juice, it’s the exact same cocktail, but its got one additional fruit making it the Special Bahraini mix – you can’t even tell the difference from the other juices, but at least you’re drinking the Special Bahraini mix… at my office they have filter coffee, instant coffee and tea… all three are mixed together along with coffee mate and some cardamom evaporated milk to come up with the Special Bahraini Mix - who decided all of this, I'm not really sure - but it's called the Special Bahraini Mix on my floor… You want to eat some grills (Mashwiyaat), there’s always some Special Bahraini Mix… The funny thing is whenever you go to one of these places and ask the guy what’s good, he’ll tell you, “you try Special Bahraini mix” – and then I say “yalla – bring for me Special Bahraini mix”… you know what I get after that? Chicken and beef on a skewer, or a shawarma over stuffed with beef and chicken.. This is the crafty work of some fella who wants to fool people by telling them this is the way Bahraini’s love their food – all hashed together and mixed up, it’s the Bahraini way – chicken, meat and cheese all cooked together … and the thing is, I get suckered into it all the time - why? I have no idea why, it just happens… I will still probably get suckered into the Special Bahraini mix the next time I feel a little peckish…
Time: 9:34 AM (so it took 6 minutes - sue me)
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