I rant you risten

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

a 20something something

Maybe you’ve already passed this moment, maybe it hasn’t hit you yet… but the 20something somethings can be a difficult moment in anyone’s life.. You’ve graduated college and then it hits you.. What the hell am I supposed to do now? For the past 3-4 years you nestled yourself in the safe arms of your university taking your required courses and your rinky dink classes (don’t you miss your rinky dink classes? Finger painting, the history of cheese, resurrection of dead languages, etc.)… Then you graduate, and then start thinking “fuck… what now? Job? No job?” Your friends, the ones who properly planned for life after college already had their jobs lined from their internships or their interviewing and lets face the facts taking all those finance related courses really paid off, should’ve listened to them instead of groofin wif dem Rastafarians… So then you do whatever every other unemployed person with no idea of what kind of career they want does, you start going to interviews, trying to sell yourself to recruiters at random companies. You’re trying to do whatever you can, checking out sales positions, applying for desk jobs, internet, job postings, anything. Then there’s the unattainable job that you spot, the one that requires all those years of experience but will have you traveling all round the world and pays out the right salary to afford that sports car you’ve always wanted – so you do it, send your resume and cover letter hoping that there’s a glimmer of a chance that the HR person is inebriated and they call you immediately for an interview. But you’re not getting any attention cause you’re an entry level punching bag, and the best you can hope for is a entry level punching bag position… They look you over and over, you have no bargaining power over them, you bring nothing to the table, except a fine understanding of finger painting - they give you one look and tell you welcome aboard…

And there you go, from recent grad, to entry level tea boy (some of the best producers in the music industry started off making tea in the studio)… making copies, trying to learn, hoping to be a good enough gopher that someone will notice your effort.. Ohh and believe me they will notice your effort.. they notice your work so much that they begin dumping everything on you, freeing up their schedule up for golf… But that’s just your work life.. You’ve got something in the bank and you can blow it off anyway you want… It’s a job, and this is what you could expect from your first job, getting bitch slapped like you’re name is Chantilly Sugar – deal with it… So you learn, you listen, you pick everything up and use it to your advantage; now you’ve got something to offer and it will help you in your next job.. or you can be your own personal hero and bust out of that job you hate like a true outlaw. I am a firm believer in the notion that you should have at least one fiery resignation in your lifetime – telling that asshole boss off. Don’t lose it like Jerry Maguire, but something that will leave a lasting effect in their minds including yours – cause for that one moment you didn’t give a shit about money or your future, you put your needs in the forefront and that’s what really builds character…

Ok so you’ve sorted out your professional life, now what? Your personal life, needs a new direction – cartoon network and cereal isn’t going to cut it anymore… You get your friends who immediately start thinking about settling down, new job – new life, might as well change it all and get married… So people hurriedly get themselves tangled in the blissful web of matrimony, and you start sweating… it starts off early or it could’ve just started, but a friend of yours gets married, and pretty soon people start giving you the winks and nudges… you look away at first, but more and more people you know start getting married and you think “should I be considering this?” maybe you should, it’s your life, I’m just telling you of the pressures you could possibly face… Whatever you decide, make sure it’s your decision... It’s ok to fall in love and make a mistake, but don’t do it cause you’re forced into it or cause you’re bored with your life… So love conquers all, or you’re sitting there just focusing on the other aspects of your life… Another aspect of married life is children… you know you’re growing up when you have a bbq with your friends and a little toddler shows up.. Your friends have kids or they’re expecting,,, should you sweat a little more? I don’t know it’s up to you, but this will be another issue you will tackle… End of the day it’s not your kid, you can play with them until they shit themselves – then you give the little one back to mommy or daddy…

Being a productive member of society also comes with it’s own hitches… You’re now expected to follow a certain path… you can’t run around causing mayhem and havoc like you did just recently… In your previous life, you didn’t know what the term weekend really meant, cause lets face it, everyday was a weekend, you decided whether you were going to wake up today or not, or whether a 72 hour videogame marathon was doable… No no no, your weekends now are sacred, the one chance you have to unwind and let it all go down… no need to shave, bathe, dress nicely.. You can pull a homer and hang out in your underwear all day if you like.. It’s your weekend… Maybe you’ll come to the realization as the years have rolled on by, you’ve started to lose whatever you had in common with your friends.. Maybe you’ll make new friends, maybe you’ll come to realize that the people you have as friends will forever be there and help you when you need it the most…

Changes my friend, this period of time is all about changes and uncertainty… There is no clear path for you, it’s like driving in fog, you’re on the right road, you’re getting there, but you need to stay focused on what’s immediately ahead of you and you can speed up if you like, but that could lead to an accident, or not... Don’t sweat it too much, there’s no need to be this worried, life always works out and if it doesn’t, then you make it work out.. That’s why you have a university degree right?

During this period, you will meet other 20somethings that have done much better than you, and others that are doing much worse than you… the point of this whole experience is to understand that this is life… people will be better than you, make more money, have better jobs, seem like they’re on the accelerated path to success; and people will be much worse off than you wishing they could have your dead end job with no benefits. If you stop to watch other people, then you’re allowing yourself to get left behind… focus on yourself and live your life the way you want to live it – just don’t bug out, the universe is not conspiring to make your life miserable…

11 comments:

Salted-Caramel said...

Lol! I loved it! :D Very realistic indeed. Not that I would know; am still in the process, but yes that's what I hear people saying all the time. I loved the way you put it. Thanks for the glimpse of the future! I just hope I end up like one of those successful business women that people envy! ;)

satisfied al said...

I so love u NOW!!! so i m not the only one ,, i feel so good...
*cheerful al makes her way to another blog.

Anonymous said...

What a fabulous post, humorous, realistic, optimistic, with a bit of pessimism thrown in to exemplify exactly how the 20's exists. As a mid-20er I have come to call this the decade of ?’S. Professional, personal, emotional all queries every individual struggles with during this period. So many people in their 20's acquire these struggles, because our paths are constantly crossed by individuals who seem to have visible success. Their career's are established, romantically they have someone to share life with, emotionally they seem balanced, yet we must take into account this could fall at surface level. They may have daddy to thank for his wonderful network of business associates, which helped them branch into a specific industry. They may have Dr.Wellbutrin to thank for their seemingly balanced mental state. My point is "looks are deceiving" and learning such in your 20's will alleviate a lot of the pressure and stress we take upon ourselves to match this same level of success. The question we need to ask ourselves, is how do we feel in our own skin? Have we reached a level of comfort where we know ourselves soundly inside and out ? Once this is achieved, I feel, more so know, everything else falls into place. At the end of the day personal growth and development build a strong foundation for professional and emotional success.

Clinical Lu

Bahraini Rants said...

Lulu,
You know how to add the missing points to my arguement... I love that, well except when it's an argument against me... You've hit the nail on the head with your final point... personal growth and development are what help make a better person.. Only problem is that people tend to look at their surface life and feel that there are no issues underneath... getting people to open up and realize that they have issues is much harder than it seems... I love you babe, have fun in the sun...

TANTALIZE said...

Bahraini Rants:

You seem to be undergoing the all encompassing Catch-22 of life as you are clearly coming to self-realization!

Evil Odd said...

First post here. Mr Rants, good to know that I'm not the only 20something here who is a proffessional (I think), and who is also lost beyond being found (a ridiculously true statement).

I haven't been checking my own blog (hah!) but I've noticed you mentioning having read Number9Dream and Cloud Atlas - Great books hey?

I actually met David Mitchell a few weeks ago. He gave a talk, and signed my book - Let me know if you are interested in what he had to say.

SillyBahrainiGirl said...

Will you register your blog with the Ministry of Information of the Government of the Holy Kingdom of Bahrain ?

Evil Odd said...

As for Maalouf, I suggest Balthasar's Oddyssey (check spelling!) - It starts off very well, but gets a bit scattered after a while - did you know that Maalouf takes off to this remote island to write and apparently hasn't travelled much since settling in wherever he is now (France?) It's strange, given that his books give you the feel that they've been written at the time of events - especially Samarkand.

There is another book by him called "The Crusaders through Arab Eyes." It's non-fiction and the title says it all really. One of my friends studied it as part of a history course and she recommends it.

Mitchell was great! He's very soft-spoken and humble. He did a reading before the talk and stopped at this word in "Cloud Atlas", looked at the audience, shook his head, and then said "I have no idea what that means!" - He went on to say how he's like those migrating birds that have brains that expand during the season of migration and contract when they settle down.

His talk was mostly about Cloud Atlas. When thinking about the plot, he imagined it as "an arrow that goes through the guts of a babushka doll and comes out of its back." As for the theme, he wanted the book to be centered around the idea of "consumption" - humans consuming humans, corporations consuming their employees, etc.

The most interesting bit though is this: Did you notice how his sentences are very short? And that his chapters are divided in a bizzillion sections? The reason behind it is that he finds it quite difficult to write a whole third person narrative and make it flow! He had no reservations about admitting that Cloud Atlas could've been a collection of short stories, but due to the pressures of the publishing world, he had to connect them all and make a novel out of it. I think you notice that in Number9Dream as well.

Sorry about the lengthy post - last thing - I asked him what his next novel was going to be about and his answer was "It's a 39.8% biography of my childhood in this English town. The whole novel is about a young boy who is in that very small place, and he never leaves it. With a plot like that, you'd expect fireworks in terms of writing style.

Then he signed my book (and drew fluffy clouds all over the page). I told him I made one of my Arabic students tell me how Cloud Atlas was structured - in Arabic - he replied telling me that I have a very dark sense of humour. That's it! 1.5 hours of my life spent very wisely!


P.S. Have you read "Guns, Germs and Steel" by Jared Diamond?

Evil Odd said...

Given that I have access to a fair bit of authors and writers, maybe I should turn my blog into a "reading" blog instead, and post interviews with authors, etc... not a bad idea hey? What do you think?

Lina said...

I so loved this post!! I'm 22 and will be graduating from uni next January... and I'm already in this confusing phase of 'what next?'

But you know what, it's actually exciting to be on this soul-searching journey! It's like periods of transition are always marked by so much uncertainty and instability, I keep telling myself that's how it should be before you make a big leap :)

I once got this very beautifully written email about the 'quarter-life crisis'... I guess I'll post it on my blog to share with all our fellow 20somthings...

Thanks Bahraini Rants :)

Mushkillah Mushkillah said...

I'm 20, i graduated from my undergrad in Graphic Design in december... i had such a hard time with the "what now" that i went on vacation for 6 weeks, came back and decided to get my master's hahaha eeh... its sad but true... i delayed the uncertainty for just a little bit longer.