a 20something something

Maybe you’ve already passed this moment, maybe it hasn’t hit you yet… but the 20something somethings can be a difficult moment in anyone’s life.. You’ve graduated college and then it hits you.. What the hell am I supposed to do now? For the past 3-4 years you nestled yourself in the safe arms of your university taking your required courses and your rinky dink classes (don’t you miss your rinky dink classes? Finger painting, the history of cheese, resurrection of dead languages, etc.)… Then you graduate, and then start thinking “fuck… what now? Job? No job?” Your friends, the ones who properly planned for life after college already had their jobs lined from their internships or their interviewing and lets face the facts taking all those finance related courses really paid off, should’ve listened to them instead of groofin wif dem Rastafarians… So then you do whatever every other unemployed person with no idea of what kind of career they want does, you start going to interviews, trying to sell yourself to recruiters at random companies. You’re trying to do whatever you can, checking out sales positions, applying for desk jobs, internet, job postings, anything. Then there’s the unattainable job that you spot, the one that requires all those years of experience but will have you traveling all round the world and pays out the right salary to afford that sports car you’ve always wanted – so you do it, send your resume and cover letter hoping that there’s a glimmer of a chance that the HR person is inebriated and they call you immediately for an interview. But you’re not getting any attention cause you’re an entry level punching bag, and the best you can hope for is a entry level punching bag position… They look you over and over, you have no bargaining power over them, you bring nothing to the table, except a fine understanding of finger painting - they give you one look and tell you welcome aboard…

And there you go, from recent grad, to entry level tea boy (some of the best producers in the music industry started off making tea in the studio)… making copies, trying to learn, hoping to be a good enough gopher that someone will notice your effort.. Ohh and believe me they will notice your effort.. they notice your work so much that they begin dumping everything on you, freeing up their schedule up for golf… But that’s just your work life.. You’ve got something in the bank and you can blow it off anyway you want… It’s a job, and this is what you could expect from your first job, getting bitch slapped like you’re name is Chantilly Sugar – deal with it… So you learn, you listen, you pick everything up and use it to your advantage; now you’ve got something to offer and it will help you in your next job.. or you can be your own personal hero and bust out of that job you hate like a true outlaw. I am a firm believer in the notion that you should have at least one fiery resignation in your lifetime – telling that asshole boss off. Don’t lose it like Jerry Maguire, but something that will leave a lasting effect in their minds including yours – cause for that one moment you didn’t give a shit about money or your future, you put your needs in the forefront and that’s what really builds character…

Ok so you’ve sorted out your professional life, now what? Your personal life, needs a new direction – cartoon network and cereal isn’t going to cut it anymore… You get your friends who immediately start thinking about settling down, new job – new life, might as well change it all and get married… So people hurriedly get themselves tangled in the blissful web of matrimony, and you start sweating… it starts off early or it could’ve just started, but a friend of yours gets married, and pretty soon people start giving you the winks and nudges… you look away at first, but more and more people you know start getting married and you think “should I be considering this?” maybe you should, it’s your life, I’m just telling you of the pressures you could possibly face… Whatever you decide, make sure it’s your decision... It’s ok to fall in love and make a mistake, but don’t do it cause you’re forced into it or cause you’re bored with your life… So love conquers all, or you’re sitting there just focusing on the other aspects of your life… Another aspect of married life is children… you know you’re growing up when you have a bbq with your friends and a little toddler shows up.. Your friends have kids or they’re expecting,,, should you sweat a little more? I don’t know it’s up to you, but this will be another issue you will tackle… End of the day it’s not your kid, you can play with them until they shit themselves – then you give the little one back to mommy or daddy…

Being a productive member of society also comes with it’s own hitches… You’re now expected to follow a certain path… you can’t run around causing mayhem and havoc like you did just recently… In your previous life, you didn’t know what the term weekend really meant, cause lets face it, everyday was a weekend, you decided whether you were going to wake up today or not, or whether a 72 hour videogame marathon was doable… No no no, your weekends now are sacred, the one chance you have to unwind and let it all go down… no need to shave, bathe, dress nicely.. You can pull a homer and hang out in your underwear all day if you like.. It’s your weekend… Maybe you’ll come to the realization as the years have rolled on by, you’ve started to lose whatever you had in common with your friends.. Maybe you’ll make new friends, maybe you’ll come to realize that the people you have as friends will forever be there and help you when you need it the most…

Changes my friend, this period of time is all about changes and uncertainty… There is no clear path for you, it’s like driving in fog, you’re on the right road, you’re getting there, but you need to stay focused on what’s immediately ahead of you and you can speed up if you like, but that could lead to an accident, or not... Don’t sweat it too much, there’s no need to be this worried, life always works out and if it doesn’t, then you make it work out.. That’s why you have a university degree right?

During this period, you will meet other 20somethings that have done much better than you, and others that are doing much worse than you… the point of this whole experience is to understand that this is life… people will be better than you, make more money, have better jobs, seem like they’re on the accelerated path to success; and people will be much worse off than you wishing they could have your dead end job with no benefits. If you stop to watch other people, then you’re allowing yourself to get left behind… focus on yourself and live your life the way you want to live it – just don’t bug out, the universe is not conspiring to make your life miserable…

OCD.. OCD.. OCD.. OCD.. OCD..

Everyone has them; I’ve got a few. They don’t really take over my life, but they are more like little quirks in my life… I checked out the obsessive-compulsive disorder foundation and got this from their site, ” In OCD, it is as though the brain gets stuck on a particular thought or urge and just can't let go. People with OCD often say the symptoms feel like a case of mental hiccups that won't go away. OCD is a medical brain disorder that causes problems in information processing. It is not your fault or the result of a "weak" or unstable personality.” The website states that an OCD can range from a little background noise to something taking over your life… I just thought I’d dissect the few common ones that I’ve noticed in myself and the people around me… Now I wont go so far as to calling them obsessive compulsive because they don’t slow me down and occupy my time, but they are the little quirks that really make me the neurotic person that I am… I’m not a doctor and if you’re a doctor or studying to be one forgive me because I’m going to call them OCDs (just like the way it sounds)…

The biggest OCD I have is locking things and double-checking if I’ve locked them… This usually happens with my car, apartment, etc… I’d drive to where I’m supposed to be… get out of the car, lock it (doesn’t matter if it’s by remote or actually locking the car through the door) and then walk off to wherever I’m going… about 10 seconds into the walk, I’d stop and then ask myself (did I just lock the car?), then I’d frantically run back, lock it twice (y’know, to make certain no one can get in) and then go back to what I’m doing… Sometimes I’d get as far as three city blocks before I start doubting myself, then I try to calm myself, and then I’d doubt myself again until I’d run back to the car… Friends that actually know this silly habit of mine, do their best to remember if I’ve locked or not (even if they reassure me, I have a way of making them doubt themselves, and then there I am, running back to the car). I need to lock the car and make sure it’s locked… I like to hear the locking confirmation sound when you press that button on your key.. beep beep.. yep it’s locked.. waitaminute… beep beep.. ok now I know it’s locked… waitaminute.. beep beep… aaahhh… one more time?

Other people have other OCDs… There’s the placement issue, in which everything needs to be organized… if you’re having dinner and you separate the salt and peppershakers from each other, my friend gets annoyed and has to bring them back together… I’d move the shakers away from each other, and you can see her notice them… she then waits a bit, tries to not let it bother her and then while you’re not looking, finally loses it and moves them back together… I like to run these little experiments on my friends, it makes waiting for your lunch so much more enjoyable…

I have another friend who needs to have the remote controls to his TV, Stereo, DVD, and whatever else all lined up side by side all facing the TV at all times, and they have to be in descending order in terms of size of the remote control… if he notices the remotes apart from each other, he will move them around… Imagine playing winning 11, bitch slapping Classic Argentina with your Classic Holland team, and the guy has to pause the game in the middle of an attack to line up the remote controls on his coffee table… DOH-NUT!

Another thing I do is hang-ups over washing my hands. I need to keep my hands clean throughout the day… My girl (who has many many mental hiccups - kidding) also has a washing OCD… she actually has a method in which she washes her hands and follows a routine. She only washes her hands that specific way and does not like smelling anything other than soap on her hands… me I just like to make sure they’re clean and I don’t trust anything except soap.. It’s not so much as washing my hands, but I just need to see soap there attempting to kick bacteria’s ass…

Airports are another place where people do this self-doubting thing as well… People will check their backpack 20 times to make sure the ticket; passport and travel documents are all safe and present… I mean you just checked 2 minutes ago, why do you need to check again…

How about people that need to lay on the side of the bed closest to the door to feel safe and have a good nights sleep… me I don’t care, I can sleep anywhere on the bed as long as it’s on the bed.. But there are people that need to sleep closest to the door, y’know in case of a fire or something like that, the flip side to this thought is that what if a mass murderer walked into the room, you’d be the first one he/she sees, now do you feel safe about sleeping closest to the door?
So these are some of the OCDs that I’ve dug up… I know there are more around, and many people have them, it’s totally natural… you should not be ashamed of the fact that you’re a neurotic person with a thing for spraying the entire bathroom with bleach before you take a bath. Expose your quirks to the world, let us laugh and ridicule at your expense, give me something to read…